Wednesday, March 07, 2007

J-Bay Day #3/Goal Met.

Well, I said that I was in need of a break and a sunburn. Today my goal was met. It was my first day off in weeks and I am in a bit of pain.

Ray and I spend the day together on the beach with friends. I played cricket with the guys, it was fun. When it was my turn to bat they laughed at me because I took a baseball stance with the cricket bat (which I think looks like something you could row a boat with, or use as a cutting board), they were not laughing for long when I send the ball soaring like Sammy Sosa with a corked bat or Jose Conseco on 'roids. It was fun. This was part of the 6 hours in the African sun which led to my super rad burn.

The worship service tonight was cool. Ben spoke about our generation and things that he thinks are fears that keeps us from doing Gods work. 1-Fear of Brokenness (our own and other peoples) 2-Fear of exposure (putting ourselves out on the line) 3-Fear of Death. I think he is right. We are so caught up on comfort, convenience and getting "ahead" that we do ministry as a second thought. He gave a time for us to think of our own fears. I think that a fear I have that if I could deal with I would be more able to be used by god, is the fear of security. A vision that I see sometimes of myself, that scares me to death, is this picture of me homeless, alone, toothless and rejected by everyone that sees me. I believe in the devil, I believe that he would love nothing more than for me to quit ministry and get a job for the sole purpose of making money (I had a better hourly wage in high school). I know that this is a vision that he puts in my head to try to get me to quit, but there are days where this fear of security (financial mainly) is so strong I honestly consider leaving the ministry. It's sounds so stupid in black and white, but its true. I pray that god continually gives me the strength to continue to do what I feel he called me and gifted me to do. Please pray for me.

The week is going well. We have tomorrow then we leave before the dawn on Friday for the trek back to Pretoria. I will be glad to get home, I miss my dogs. Cheers.



Suzy said...

Don't worry Chris. Tim and I will never reject you. Well, as long as you're not toothless, at least. Then it's a different story altogether.

betsy said...

hey chris! kristy and daniel byrd are moving to mozambique this month and wondered if you ever travel there. their blogspot is if you wanted to leave em a message or something when you have a chance.

ashby said...

Your dentition will never keep me from loving you.